Adventure – Birth of Adventure

Fueling and Following Your Heart: An Adirondack Adventure

Fueling and Following Your Heart: An Adirondack Adventure

In spring 2023 I made a decision that surprised a lot of people, including myself. After 20 years of living in Western New York, and 11 years of working for the Girl Scouts of WNY, I was called to take on a new adventure.

One surprise was that this adventure required moving in the wrong direction – I’d always thought that if I ever left Buffalo it would be to move back to Canada, and be closer to my family there. Another surprise was taking on a new nonprofit CEO role, as I’d thought that when it came time to leave GSWNY it would be to consult, or when I became a wildly successful author (this woman always dreams!) The timing was also a surprise because I wasn’t yet looking for a new job and wasn’t considering moving.

But despite these plans, in May 2023, I was invited out of the blue to visit Double H Ranch, a camp for children with serious illness, located in the foothills of the Adirondacks. Even before setting foot on the beautiful camp property, I was moved to tears by the joy and gratitude expressed by children, parents and volunteers who shared their stories on video. Once I’d spent time touring the adaptive programming and property, and talking with members of the board and staff leadership team, the call and pull was sealed that this was a place where I was meant to serve and to be part of.

Choosing to take on a new role with this impactful organization and move to this beautiful town filled with lakes, rivers, forests and mountains was the easy part; choosing to leave the wonderful people of Buffalo and GSWNY was the hard part.

I’ll come back to the most important factor in this equation: this decision wasn’t only mine to make. In 2023, David and I celebrated our 20th anniversary. It was also 20 years since Ben was born and we moved from Toronto to America. In these 20 years, David and I had made a family and home together. The kids were now grown and out of the house, based in Texas and in Toronto, so our moving wouldn’t have a big impact on them. But it would be a big change for David, and for his work which was beginning to really gain momentum.

Making the decision on my part came down to what I’ve titled this blog post: following and fueling your heart. David and I had been talking about our love of water, and of how much we’d love to be closer to nature, surrounded by trees, space, and near an ocean or lake. Ever since I’d met David, he’d dreamt of building a house, and some of our early dates were spent touring lots for sale in the country, south of Buffalo. And although I wasn’t searching for a new job, I was reflecting on when the ideal time would be for me and for GSWNY to find a new CEO to take over.

In my CEO interview for the GSWNY board, a question was asked: “How long do you plan to stay in this role?” I answered honestly, “For as long as I feel that I am the best person for the job”, which at the time I estimated to be about 5-10 years. By May 2023 I’d been CEO for 4 ½ years, but the compounded stress of the pandemic and multiple crises had compressed that timeline for me, and left me feeling that what GSWNY needed was someone with fresh energy, and with the skills and vision that were best for where the organization was now. The clear vision and direction I’d had in January 2019 when first assuming the role was irrevocably changed in March 2020, and I’d poured everything I had into leading and steering the organization through those hard times. I still felt a deep sense of passion and ownership for the mission of GSWNY, and loyalty and responsibility for the thousands of girls, volunteers and staff who were part of it, but I knew in my heart of hearts that this would be a perfect time for this transition, for me, and for the organization.

Which brings me back to David. When I was invited to interview, we watched the camp videos together on our living room couch. He said that he was open to the idea of moving, and encouraged me to learn more. When I came back from the interviews and camp tour (along with our friend Ellen who had been in town and game for a last minute road trip), I told David that if I was lucky enough to be offered this job, that I wanted to take it. When the call came with the offer, he said, “20 years ago, you moved to Buffalo for me and the kids, and now it’s my turn to follow you.”

Following and fueling. And I’m happy to say the kids were supportive as well.

What came next was a roller coaster. Gratitude and excitement. Stress and upheaval. Certainty alternating with doubt, laced with panic. As I shared the news at work, and with friends and family, it felt like the train was leaving the station and I needed to make sure I was on it, and not being dragged or run over by it. What was I doing? I was 48, established, with a great job. Was this a mid-life crisis?

There will be time to share more about the Adirondack Adventures of 2023, but the main point is that in all of the noise and second guessing, I needed to settle in and listen to my heart. And it was telling me that this was the right thing to do.

Gaining confidence in the decision, the notice period was still too short for comfort: 7 weeks. Both Double H and GSWNY were supportive of me and each other’s needs, and I was able to travel back and forth between Lake Luzerne and Buffalo for the first few months so that I could continue to help GSWNY’s board and Interim CEO with the leadership transition, and so that I could find David and I a place to live.

We moved into our temporary rental home November 1, in the town of Lake Luzerne, in a little house across from a park and the Hudson River, a short walk from the lake and public beach, and a ten minute drive from camp.

Hudson River across the street from our rental house

You may be wondering how the new job is going, and how David is faring with the transition.

On my first day of work, I was nervous about what looked like an intense first day on the job. My last official day at GSWNY was August 1. On August 2, the car was packed for the drive to camp, and I arrived and checked into my cabin around 10pm. The schedule for August 3rd was an 8am staff breakfast, camper arrival at 10am, and a donor and board tour and reception at 4pm. At 7:30am I called David and told him I was nervous about meeting everyone. He said wisely, “They are likely more scared to meet you”. Getting myself in check, I walked down to the peaceful lake, took a deep breath, and walked to the dining hall for some coffee and to meet the staff team. Within one minute, I knew that this was an amazing place filled with incredible people, and I felt right about my decision. And when the campers arrived later that morning, greeted exuberantly by cheering staff and volunteers, the smiling faces of campers and teary, grateful faces of parents showed me this camp was magic.

David has been an amazing support, and a hearty adventurer. We were away from each other a lot over the first few months, but have had more time together since we moved into the rental home. His business is still based in Buffalo, and we still have our house there, and he’s planning on bidding on green roof projects in the Capital region soon. (If you know of any contacts for him please share!!!)

And as luck would have it, Double H is less than 3 miles down the road from a Girl Scout Camp -Hidden Lake- and their CEO Brenda and I have had a chance to swap camp tours and my inbox is filling with cookie orders, so you know that once a Girl Scout, always a Girl Scout.

I miss my friends and family from the WNY/Southern Ontario area, but I’m happy to say that my heart has been followed and is being fueled. I’d love to hear from you, (and host you) and here’s to an amazing year of adventures!

Birthing a Novel and the Birth of Adventure Birthday

This year for my birthday I gave myself the gift of a writing retreat.

Four days away from all distractions, with no obligations other than to finally finish the first draft of my novel – the novel I started writing in 2017. Five years ago.

It is a luxury and when the opportunity arose, I jumped at it. I packed up my bags and met my friend Jes (also writing a book) and we spent the past weekend in a cabin in North Carolina, tucked away amongst the trees with a babbling brook alongside the porch.

Each day and evening we wrote, with a few breaks for movement, rest, food, and one ambitious day, a hike in the mountains.

Yes, it was idyllic. But even if we were in less idyllic surroundings, the biggest gift of this writing retreat was to give myself time and space to write. Something I find difficult at home when I’m amid responsibilities that feel more pressing and important. I also find it hard after a workday to motivate myself to pick up my computer when the cozy couch and my spouse are nearby looking much more appealing.

I joked with my family that I felt like Colin Firth’s character in “Love Actually”, typing away in his cottage in France, minus the housekeeper-love interest of course. (And with my laptop instead of a typewriter, I had no need to make copies.) I wanted this experience for myself – to see if getting away from it all would help me to finish what I started so long ago.

As I shared above, my goal for the weekend was to finish the first draft of a middle grade novel that I have been writing off and on for five years. Even if I’m the only person who ever reads this novel, it means a lot to me, but for many reasons I’d been unable to finish it.

To be fair, I’ve written other things in that time. A little over a year ago, I launched my blog Birth of Adventure, and ran a contest for friends and family to subscribe leading up to my birthday.

The blog came about when I had been feeling restless and anxious about my impending empty nest– reflecting on closing a chapter in my life and the uncertainty of what my next chapter would be like. In the empty space that opened, I wanted to fill it with something I’d be excited for – and I saw traveling and writing as what I wanted to let back into my life.

So, looking back a year later, how did I do? Between November 2021 to March 2022, I published 11 blog posts. Not too bad. I took the dream trip to Scotland I’d been planning for a year. And then I stopped blogging. As I shared in my October post, I got tired. Instead of writing publicly, I turned inward for some quiet.

In that space, the novel beckoned to me again. I picked it up and dusted it off. And made slow progress. Snail level progress. I joined writing communities with Highlights Foundation. I took writing classes. I worked on story development. I wrote a full outline. And then I enrolled in a class called “Just Do It”, which told me to just do it.

So my birthday gift to myself was the time and space to finally finish writing the first draft. I was so close I could feel it. I’d written 150 pages, and felt I was about 15,000 words away, but reaching the finish line was eluding me.

You may wonder why I care so deeply about the story? Part of it is a love letter to my mom who I lost 16 years ago. The novel is about a 13-year-old girl named Charlotte who deals with the grief of losing her mother by casting herself into a self-imposed exile – broken reluctantly by a new neighbor – with friendships and hijinks included. It is set in my neighborhood on the West Side of Buffalo, with a cast of friends inspired by some of our close family friendships. It includes Girl Scouts of course – Charlotte’s troop of friends – and there is plenty of adventure and food, some of my favorite things. I hope that a grieving child might find comfort, recognition and hope in this story, and that others will feel empathy and be reminded about the importance of friendship.

With a story that I care so deeply about, why did I keep stopping? One, I was getting stuck in the middle – I knew the beginning, I knew the end, but I didn’t know how to connect those together. The outline solved that. There was a bigger issue. I felt that if I was a writer, then beautiful, flowing, articulate words should pour out of my fingers like honey. And crappy, hack-ish, meandering words were clunking out of my keyboard. What if I finally finished this novel and learned I’m a terrible writer? What if I’m not like Diana Gabaldon whose first “practice” novel Outlander became a major bestseller and a series?

In the “Just Do It” class, our teacher told us that all that mattered was the words getting on the page. Finishing the draft. The beautiful, articulate words could wait for the second or third or fourth draft. Something in her message sunk in, and I gave myself permission to write a crappy first draft.

That was my birthday gift to myself – the gift of time, and space. The gift to get it done. The gift to finish something that was my dream, even though on most days I acted like it was a task or expectation imposed on me. Writing this novel has been hard. I don’t always like to do things I find hard.

In our cozy cabin this weekend, I sat in front of the computer. I plodded through, unflinching at the parts that were hack-ish, amateurish, hokey, cheesy, you name it. I embraced it all. I threw the clay down, knowing that ahead of me would the fun part of revising and polishing until it becomes something that I’d be willing to share even if not comfortable to share.

And I’m proud to say …….

I finished it!!!!

When the weekend started I was at 150 pages, and I finished the weekend with 220 pages. Some of the writing I loved, some made me laugh, some made me cry. A lot made me cringe and was very, very crappy. But it is done!! Instead of staring down the road at a never ending abyss, I now have a foundation of clay to mold.

After I take a nice long break over the holidays.

Sometimes we follow our dreams, and the dream turns out to be hard. I appreciate you taking the time to read this and hope you continue to take on the things you’ve been dreaming to do as well.

Best, Alison

My Dream Trip to Scotland

A year ago in March 2021, I shared with my friends and family on Facebook that I was planning to write and travel again. I described this in my first blog post on Birth of Adventure:

“A main theme of this blog, a lesson learned from losing my parents and brothers and others too young, is that life is short. Too short to leave passions and dreams dormant. Too short to be looking back with regrets.

I’d been dreading the empty space ahead but what if I looked at it as a precious gift of time waiting for me? After a year of living in isolation, with cancelled plans and disappointments, I needed something to look forward to.

And so I started planning a dream trip, something that I wanted.

I set a date in the not too distant future – spring 2022 – for my dream trip to Scotland. David and I had each visited separately and wanted to go back together. And I’d recently been tracking my family’s ancestry to the small island of Coll – I wanted to see this tiny island with more sheep than people where my ancestors had lived for hundreds of years.

As enthusiasm and energy filled me with something so wonderful to look forward to: the food, the sea, the mountains! (and for Outlander friends, Jamie!), I knew I was ready to start writing again. I wanted to share stories of travel, adventure, family, life and even death. Stories to help and inspire living fully, intentionally and courageously.“

Setting an intention for this great adventure gave me something (outside of my family and my job) to hold on to over the past year – something to look forward to. And having a trip to plan and to write about grounded me in starting this blog; as my mind flitted from topic to topic, I had a theme I could keep coming back to.

I have to admit though, that as the pandemic continued and COVID-19 rates climbed in WNY and elsewhere, as our family Christmas travel was cancelled, and borders to many countries remained closed, I found it hard to believe traveling overseas would be possible. It felt like my dream trip would remain just a dream.

Because of this, I delayed booking flights and making any confirmed plans besides a tour and a few accommodations here and there.

Although nothing is certain, and the pandemic continues, I am now optimistic that we are really going, and I spent a joyful weekend booking flights and planning our itinerary. With confirmed plans (including travel insurance of course), my energy and mood has shifted. I am excited!!!

We will be leaving in a month, and I’ll be sharing real-time updates in the Birth of Adventure Facebook group (please join if you would like to follow along), and I will write about our adventures in this blog, while on the trip and after.

Travel bloggers that I follow have shared that a downside to travel writing is they are not always fully present to the experiences around them. Planning around the perfect photo or story, or sitting in a café or hotel room writing instead of exploring can take away from the purpose of travel. I made a promise to myself to be as fully present on this trip as possible, and so I will write when the inspiration strikes, and only then.

I love planning a trip almost as much as I love actual traveling. Before a trip, the options are endless. I close my eyes and imagine everywhere we could go and everything we could see. Shetland! Orkney Islands! Isle of Skye! The Highland Games! Hiking the West Highland Way! Cairngorm National Park!

All of those listed above, while amazing, did not make our trip itinerary, for many reasons. I had fun planning this trip but as many people have shared, planning can mirror some of what happens while traveling – overwhelm, frustration, budget worries, FOMO, and realizing that the time you have could not possibly include everything you want to do.

I set aside three weeks because I knew that I needed a mini-sabbatical – enough time to decompress from work and responsibilities after the past two years to really recharge.

David and I have visited Scotland once before – me in 1999 with my London flat mates on a school break in October, and David in fall 2002, a few months before Ben was born. We both took bus tours which covered a lot of iconic destinations.

This time, 20(+) years later, we wanted to spend more time in one place, and to spend more time on our feet than in a vehicle. We also had already visited some spectacular places like the Isle of Skye and Loch Ness that we could cross off of our list.

There are a tremendous amount of wonderful things to see and do and experience in Scotland which can make planning overwhelming, and so we approached this trip by centering ourselves with a few wish list adventures we knew we were going to include.

As I wrote in the passage above, I started with researching our own ancestral ties to Scotland. David and I each have a quarter Scottish ancestry, and I was able to trace my family who were crofters on the tiny island of Coll (13 miles long and 3 miles wide, with just about 160 year-round residents), and David’s family, who we believe were gunsmiths or hammersmiths in the Gorbals, an area in Glasgow. Our itinerary includes both locations.

We knew we wanted some time by the sea, some time experiencing the city life (including great restaurants!), and some time in the Highlands. And we each had a few bucket list items we wanted to see and do.

We love traveling by train so we decided not to rent a car (I was also a bit nervous about driving on the left side of the road – not going to lie). The flexibility of having a car and being able to more easily get anywhere was outweighed by us sitting in a train or bus, being able to read/write and watch the world go by.

As I mentioned above, we did cross a lot off of our list due to time, to money, and some places because we could not access them easily by public transportation, but what is included and listed below are the sights and adventures that made the list which are what we most wanted to experience on this trip. And as a travel planning rule, it’s not a bad thing to leave some destinations for the future – to entice you to come back again to visit one day.

This is our Scotland dream adventure itinerary for 2022:

City Life:

Edinburgh – 4 nights

Our days in Edinburgh are mainly left open (besides our B&B reservation) so we can make them up as we go along. We’ll have several days meandering around the city, visiting museums, eating delicious food, with two firm plans: David’s birthday dinner and a day trip for me on an Outlander tour (visiting settings in the books, and places used as filming locations for the TV show).

Glasgow – 4 nights

We’ll arrive in Glasgow on the train from Edinburgh, and spend another several days left mainly open to explore to our heart’s content. Again, we have two firm plans – one, is a scheduled day tour of The Gorbals (an ancestry tour for David), and on our last day I’m having brunch with Kathi, a Scottish travel blogger who I follow and who inspires me, and I look very forward to meeting her and talking travel and writing (and Scotland of course).

Scottish Highlands:

Fort William – 2 nights

From Glasgow, we’ll take a bus up to Fort William (known as the outdoor capital of the UK) which we will use as a base for two nights and three days. Fort William is nestled near Ben Nevis, the highest mountain in the British isles, and is nearby Glencoe (image above). One of the days David and I will be hiking up Glencoe with a guide, and another we’ll be taking an iconic 84 mile return train trip – riding the Jacobite Steam Train from Fort William to Mallaig, crossing the Glenfinnan viaduct (image below), a sight made famous in its depiction as the Hogwarts Express in the Harry Potter movies.

Jacobite Steam Train passing over Glenfinnan viaduct

Inverness – 3 nights

After a day of hiking in Glencoe, our guide will drop us off at the Fort William bus stop where we’ll ride up to Inverness, considered to be the capital of the Highlands. Inverness in Gaelic means “the mouth of the (river) Ness”, and we will use this as a base for 3 days. Both David and I have already searched for Nessie in Loch Ness (and sadly we did not see her), so this time we’ll be taking a day trip for some history – a tour of Culloden (site of the final battle in the Jacobite uprising in 1746), and another day, we will enjoy a boat ride along the Caledonian canal.

Oban – 1 night

We will ride the bus from Inverness southwest to the seaside town, Oban. Oban is known as the gateway to the Hebridean islands. This is a quick stop as we’ll be leaving early the next morning to catch our ferry to the isle of Coll. One scheduled outing is a whisky tour (and tasting) at the Oban Distillery, which was established in 1793.

Island/Ocean Relaxation:

Isle of Coll – 6 nights

Ahhh… After two weeks of city hopping, hiking and exploring, David and I will be ready to relax. From Oban, we’ll take a very early ferry to the beautiful isle of Coll where we’ll stay for 6 nights. Our itinerary for this week is completely open except for one dinner and one lunch reservation at the only two restaurants on the island. We’ve rented bicycles for the week and will spend each day as we wish – relaxing, reading, writing, leisurely bike rides, and possibly just sitting and looking at the sea at one of the island’s many beaches. (And I can’t wait to share pictures of where we will be staying!)

From Coll, we’ll spend a day journeying by ferry and train back to Glasgow to sleep before flying home the next day (if we decide we will come home, that is).

I look forward to sharing about our experiences while in Scotland and when we return.

For now, please share any suggestions or comments about places you’ve visited, heard about or longed to visit in the areas I’ve listed above – we may check them out!

I can’t wait to share our adventures and hear about yours!

Easing into travel – in 2022 and beyond

Are you dreaming of traveling again in 2022 but you’re not sure where to start?

Traveling, like so many other parts of our lives, has been increasingly uncertain, with additional risks and measures you have to think about and be prepared for. If you love to travel, and are dreaming of venturing out again, I’m sharing some tips in this post to ease your way back in. These tips can be helpful as a progression for first-time travelers too.

Last year, when I first picked April 2022 as the time to depart to Scotland, I thought that this date would be far enough into the future to be free of worry about border closures or changes in plans. I didn’t anticipate the omicron variant and rising COVID-19 rates that would lead to additional restrictions and border closures.

I’m optimistic, and although I have a back-up domestic travel plan in place, I’m still moving forward with my plans to roam the hills, mountains and glens in Scotland this spring. This will be David’s and my first time flying across the ocean since 2016. Now that this trip is getting closer, I’m starting to feel the excitement! There is a bit more to worry about this year, however, including COVID-19 measures such as pre-departure and arrival testing for the flights and border crossing, all the way to preparing for emergencies that could occur, like what would we do if we got sick and/or had to quarantine while overseas, possibly being delayed returning home or worse.

Although on a regular basis I’m fairly homebound, I’ve been dipping my toes back into travel the past two years, from local vacation home rentals to short drives, to a two-week road trip to Texas to see our grandbaby Gemma, to a work conference trip involving a return flight to Tucson, Arizona, and I crossed an international border three times in 2021 to visit my family in Canada.

Having eased in, I feel ready to take the next step to fly overseas to visit Scotland. Having said that, if you’re planning to travel during this pandemic, it’s very important to know your own tolerance for risk.

If you think about it, traveling has a lot of similar factors to life at home – depending on how you do it. You can shelter solo or as a family unit by camping, glamping, or renting a cabin, cottage or house/condo, with a full range of options from rustic outdoors, to fully furnished houses with all the comforts of home, while offering a different landscape or environment to enjoy. If you are nervous about eating in restaurants, or want to spend less, these types of accommodations let you cook in a kitchen, (some fully stocked) or on a grill or over a campfire. You can start with day trips, overnights, weekends, long road trips, all the way to flying to overseas and far off destinations. And if you’re up to it, there are hotels and restaurants aplenty just like at home.

For easing back into travel, I’d recommend starting with where your comfort level is already – if you are out and about, eating in restaurants and seeing shows, you can find many destinations where you can do all of that, and if you’re mainly staying in and trying to avoid crowds of people, then you might want to start with a few day trips, or a small road trip and a home stay.

Below is a list of options at different comfort and budget levels:

Distance:

Day Trips
Short Overnight Trips
Road Trips – including Interstate/Interprovince
Domestic Flight Trips
International Travel – Ground Travel/Same Continent
International Travel – Intercontinental/Overseas

Accommodations:

Sheltering Solo or as a Unit: Camping/RVing/Cabin/Cottage/Vacation Home Rentals
Hotels/Hostels/B&B’s

Where to start:

Day trips – start here if you want to go on short adventures but want to start and end your day in your own home and your own bed.

You may already have your favorite places, but if you’re looking for ideas for new short destinations check out your local tourism boards, for example here in Buffalo, NY we have Visit Buffalo Niagara which lists activities and events. Also check out your local parks, trails, beaches, nonprofit organizations, camps, and adventure-based organizations such as hatchet-throwing, snowshoeing, skiing, etc.

Being in Buffalo I’m spoiled for great day trip opportunities and some of my recent favorites included Buffalo’s Outer Harbor, Canalside, Niagara Falls, Reinstein Woods, the Buffalo Zoo and many others, and walking or hiking at local parks and camps.

Day Trips in Western New York

Sheltering solo or as a unit: Camping/RVing/Cabin/Cottage/ Vacation Home Rentals

These types of facility rentals are for you if you want to control your exposure to crowds, cook your own meals and avoid reliance on restaurants. This is a good option for families and groups traveling together. There are many budget options and when you’re easing in, you can take a short domestic trip or a longer domestic road trip:

2 a) Short Trips

Start here if you want to experience new locations a little further from home but close enough that you could get home easier in case of emergency and have access to your own healthcare system. This could include public transportation or car travel.

2 b) Interstate/Interprovince Road Trip

This is a good place to start if you feel comfortable traveling far from home, but still want to avoid hotels, you want to control your exposure to crowds, cook your own meals and avoid reliance on restaurants. There are many budget options.

Why choose to shelter solo or as a family unit:

I am a big fan of renting a house, condo or cabin/cottage while traveling, and for the budget conscious, being able to cook your own meals helps to keep costs down, and the accommodations tend to be more spacious, comfortable and cost effective when you have a group or family traveling together.

Over the years I’ve stayed in beautiful rentals across the budget spectrum, and often less expensive than hotels, in many places including Criccieth, Wales; rentals in Ontario, Canada and in New York State; in Austin, Texas; in Cape Cod, Mass, and Cocoa Beach, Florida. And many tent camping or cabin stays at state and provincial parks which are very low cost.

For major rental services I use airbnb the most, but I’ll also rent through Vrbo (and formerly HomeStay which was since folded into the Vrbo umbrella). I also like to search for rentals directly from national or state parks or local agencies for the best deals. For camping, here in New York State there are over 15,000 campsites and 800 cabin rentals available for rental, and if you search your own area you’ll find a lot of options.

We live in a city apartment, and so I love to rent places near the water or in a forest, allowing for settings and landscapes that I don’t see every day. There are a lot of price points, and it is always worth sending a message to the property owner to see if there is any wiggle room on the price or rules, especially if it is not peak travel season. For example, I’ve received permission to bring my dog to a rental that wouldn’t normally allow pets, and have been able to get some really amazing discounts on places that would have been out of my budget. I always try to leave a place as good or better than I found it, and remember that on some sites the owner of the property can leave a review on you as a renter, so keeping a good rating is important for future bookings. On airbnb I’ve even gotten surprise deals or concessions from owners who see my “stellar” rental rating (their words).

When you are traveling off-season, and traveling during the pandemic you might already find significant deals. For example, we love to stay in Wellfleet, Cape Cod, and the prices in May and October are nearly a fraction of the prices in the summer, but August was the only time we could typically go because of Ben’s school schedule. With virtual work and school, we finally got to travel in the offseason, in May 2021, and take advantage of those lower rates.

Home stays in Wellfleet, Cape Cod

3. Domestic Flight Trips

You can start here if you feel comfortable with crowds at the airport, traveling by airplane and being further from home but you don’t want to deal with international borders.

I had the opportunity to fly to Tucson, AZ for a work conference in November 2021 – my first time flying during the pandemic. It was a warm and mainly outdoor setting, everyone who was attending had to be vaccinated, and masks were required for indoor meetings. Flying there, I felt comfortable with the safety protocols on the plane, with passengers wearing masks and extra hygiene measures such as wipes for table trays, etc.

I had never been to Arizona before and made sure to arrive early so that I could hike in the desert before the conference started. We stayed in a hotel that had many outdoor amenities including outdoor dining.

For booking hotel accommodations, I like to use Booking.com which has the option to book now, and pay later – you can book all of your hotel stays in advance with no deposit needed and if your trip gets cancelled, you can cancel the hotel reservations without penalty (as long as you do it by the posted date which is usually about 24-48 hours in advance of your stay.) Make sure to understand change and cancel fees for your airline travel as well, and I recommend buying the extra travel insurance.

Domestic Flight Trip to Tucson, Arizona

4. International Travel

4 a) Ground Travel/Same Continent

In 2021 I crossed the border 3 times to visit my family in Canada after being separated for 18 months. The US/Canada border closing was the first obstacle, and once Canadian citizens were permitted to enter Canada, the two-week mandatory quarantine within Canada was too much of a barrier for me. In summer 2021, vaccinated Canadians were allowed to enter Canada from the US without needing to quarantine and I packed my bags to go.

Traveling across an international border takes extra planning, generally you will need a passport and during the pandemic, there are a lot of potential extra steps and expenses. I had to upload my travel plans on the ArriveCan app, including my quarantine plan, and to present my vaccination card, and proof of a negative COVID-19 test within the past 72 hours at the border. Twice I had to take an additional COVID-19 test at the border, one involving a long delay with the testing facility set up at the nearby racetrack. The crossings took much longer than usual with several delays.

Be sure to take a pulse check of your comfort level. For me, I am a citizen of Canada, very familiar with traveling there, my family lives in Canada, and so besides the extra steps and expense, it was still fairly comfortable for me. If you are traveling far, and/or if you don’t have family or friends in the country, think about what your quarantine and emergency plan would be if you got sick and had to get treatment or had to quarantine before returning home. This could include budgeting to have additional funds to cover up to an extra 10-14 days in the country to quarantine, and buying travel insurance that covers medical expenses.

5 b) International Travel – Intercontinental/Overseas

If you feel comfortable to take this step, then begin preparing and planning.

Border: First check the border: is it open? If it is open, are there any restrictions for travelers in your region? My son Ben has tried several times to go on an international program as part of his gap year, and turn after turn the country he was intending to go to closed its border. He finally got approved for an overseas volunteer job and will be leaving shortly.

Safety: If you are able to go, check if you feel comfortable with the country’s COVID-19 rates, vaccination rates, and safety protocols. For US residents, you can check CDC recommendations for different countries, and US government recommendations and other countries likely have a similar tool. This can be helpful in gaining information, for example if you will have access to COVID-19 testing to meet requirements to fly back home. The CDC does recommend that only vaccinated individuals travel internationally.

Travel Requirements: If you are ready to move forward use the resources above and any others to research what you will need to enter the country and return home. For international flights you’ll likely need to take a pre-departure and possibly arrival testing. Like ground travel, have a quarantine plan. Also consider what you would do if a) you take the pre-departure test and it is positive even though you have no symptoms. You now need to self-isolate until you are cleared to travel home which could be around two weeks. This may include a doctor’s visit or two to get cleared for travel. Where will you stay and how will you get food – will your travel insurance cover that, and if not, do you have enough funds saved for that?

And B) what if you get really sick – this is up in one of the worst case scenarios. It will help if you research the medical system, and know how to seek medical care.

For me, I am vaccinated and boosted, and if you read my blog post “Birth of Adventure Part One – Discovering Adventure in New Zealand”, you know that I spent two weeks 9,000 miles from home recovering from surgery and injuries after a hang gliding accident in 2002. From this experience and a few others on foreign soil, I’ve built up my confidence to handle some extreme situations that might happen. Because I lived in the United Kingdom for two years and have some friends and family in England and Wales, I also feel that I can make a decent emergency plan if anything happens. Having said that, I’m focusing on a safe and wonderful trip, but I am prepared in case.

So now that I’ve been easing in, I’m ready to stretch out of my comfort zone and fly to Scotland. I have a back up travel plan, I have my emergency quarantine plan, and David and I are also being flexible with how we travel in Scotland, for example, if needed, we can socially distance and spend all of our time roaming in parks, walking on the beach and climbing hills – especially since the landscapes in Scotland are one of the best parts that we want to experience.

Please share any tips that you have for easing into travel in the comments section. And if you’re most comfortable staying home for now, you can start with some daytrips, or planning where you will go sometime in the future. Half the fun is the dreaming, reading and the possibilities ahead of time. Wishing you all safe travels ahead!

Pick up the Glove-Reflections, Completions and Intentions for the New Year

Pick up the Glove – Reflections, Completions and Intentions for the New Year

Twenty years ago on December 30, I was sweating and slightly panicky about my first date with my now husband David. He asked me out for New Year’s Eve, and as I lived in Toronto and he lived just outside of Buffalo, NY, it was a bit complicated. He offered to cook me dinner at his place, and because I didn’t drive he also offered to pick me up at my parent’s house in rural Ontario where I was staying for the holidays. Lest this sound like I was a teenager, I had just celebrated my 27th birthday.

I was surprisingly nervous. Nervous to find out if the feelings we had while talking remotely would still be there when we were together, nervous about navigating a weekend long date, and mostly nervous about my loud chaotic family being part of it.

It was too late to wish I’d gone to my place in Toronto first – he was already on his way to meet me. My brothers and sisters teased me about all the things they could say and do to embarrass me. I grabbed a glass of wine and practiced breathing.

The snow was coming down hard and David was stuck in a snowstorm – he did finally make it safely but it was a tough drive. When he arrived he gave me a book – “West with the Night”, a memoir by Beryl Markham, a woman adventurer and aviator who was the first person to fly solo, non-stop across the Atlantic from Britain to North America. David said he thought I would like it when he heard I was flying in a small craft airplane with some other students in our course. I loved it.

After a few of my siblings did their best shenanigans, we headed out. A pleasant conversation was cut short when David’s car broke down, in the middle of nowhere, in the middle of a snowstorm. My sister Abbie kindly drove out to pick us up, and after a few more Wilcox family shenanigans, David spent the night in my brother’s bedroom at my parent’s house. We laughed about it, but this date was definitely not going as planned.

The next day, New Year’s Eve, we spent several freezing hours in a Canadian Tire parking lot while David fixed his car. I kept him company and kept him supplied with hot drinks and snacks.

I can’t remember why I wasn’t wearing my gloves in that weather, but for some reason I was holding them – either squished between my arm and side, or in my hands. What I do remember is that I kept dropping them. Each time I dropped a glove I became more self-conscious.

Recently a friend had told me he thought I was “sloppy”, ie., the type of person whose shoelaces would always come untied, and he encouraged me to become more polished. It didn’t help that I was also considered “Awkward Ally” a lot. After about the third time I dropped a glove I made a self-deprecating comment, and tried to laugh it off.

David turned to me and said “Just pick up the glove. That’s all there is.”

I laughed. It seemed simple. The glove was on the ground and no matter how I felt about it, all there was to do was to pick it up. Beating myself up about dropping it wouldn’t change anything.

I picked it up. And when I stopped worrying about what David thought, and stopped being caught up in an existential crisis about my perceived sloppiness, something else happened.

I stopped dropping the gloves. It seemed easier to pay attention to them when my mind wasn’t focused on worrying so much.

That was one of the first traditions that lived on after this date – for several years, whenever one of us would get dramatic or make a lot of meaning about something, we would remind each other to just “Pick up the glove”.

David managed to get his car running, and we made it to his place in Hamburg, NY in time for our New Year’s Eve date. He made me a delicious pasta dinner, and was excited to serve me a dessert of fresh espresso and delectable chocolate truffles his brother had gotten in New York City. David handed me the chocolate, and told me to put it in my mouth and then take a sip of the espresso. The hot coffee melted the chocolate and the taste combination was incredible.

To cap off the evening, we decided to reflect on our past year, and set an intention for the next year. We each wrote a list of what we wanted to highlight from the past year – things we were proud of, things we wanted to complete and leave behind, lessons we had learned. Then we wrote a list of what we wanted to create for the next year – what we wanted to do, who we wanted to become. We shared these lists with each other.

That first date led to another date, and then another, and I don’t take for granted after our own histories, that we just celebrated our 20th anniversary of our first New Year’s date together.

Each New Year’s Eve since then, give or take a few days, David and I set aside an evening to enjoy a lovely dinner, and share our reflections and completions from the past year, and our intentions and creations for the next year. Sometimes we are joined by our kids, sometimes joined by friends, and most times just the two of us.

For the sake of keeping this blog post to a reasonable length, I won’t share everything from my list, and instead share a few personal reflections and completions from 2021:

2021 Reflections and Completions:

Family:

We said goodbye to my wonderful grandpa Lloyd Wilcox who passed away in May. Because of the pandemic and border closure, I joined his funeral and celebration of his life on zoom. I am leaving behind the sadness at not being able to be together in person during that time, and bringing with me the joy I felt when I was reunited with many of my family members in July when the border finally reopened. I think of my grandpa often as someone who lived life fully and loved generously.

We celebrated Ben turning 18, graduating from high school and looking forward to his next adventure.

We welcomed two new babies to the family and two new sets of parents were formed. Sweet baby Bernie was born in February, my youngest brother and sister-in-law’s first child and my niece. And sweet baby Gemma – my stepdaughter Sarah and son-in-law Liam’s first baby was born in October, making David and I proud new grandparents. We haven’t hugged and cuddled these babies enough due to the pandemic, but I’m so glad for each moment that we got and look forward to more to come.

Rediscovering Writing and Adventure:

In March I declared an intention to write, to start a blog and to plan an adventure to Scotland in 2022. I attribute the supportive words from friends and family at this time as the boon that gave me the guts to make it happen.

In May I became a co-author for “The Rising Sisterhood Book Two“, spent the summer writing and revising my chapter, and was proud to be a published author when the book came out in October. I’ll share more about the wonderful experience that being part of this collective was, but in short, it was a supportive community of women who helped me get through the anxiety of telling my story publicly, in writing and on video, and all that was entailed. Because of this experience and sisterhood, I gained the confidence to push through those feelings and realize I could do it.

In October I procrastinated launching the blog by dusting off the middle grade novel I started a few years ago and taking a Highlights Foundation writing class in my spare time to breathe life back into it. I’m nearly 10,000 words in and still going.

In November with the tech and design expertise of my talented niece Molly, I launched the Birth of Adventure blog, and I was beyond gratified by the comments and feedback from family and friends. Thank you for reading – I appreciate you and it means a lot.

For 2022, I’ll share a few simple intentions:

I will keep writing. I’ll share stories in the Birth of Adventure blog, and finish the first draft of my novel which has characters and a story I love and dreamed of telling

I will plan and take a great adventure in Scotland with David this spring

I will keep exercising and build my strength so that I can actively hike and climb hills in Scotland

I will hug and cuddle the babies whenever I can

I will be open to being a yes to adventure

I will lead with empathy and courage and help grow leaders around me

And last but not least, when I inevitably stumble, I will pick up the glove

If you haven’t spent some time reflecting on the past year and setting an intention for the next year, I invite you to consider doing this in a way that best works for you. If you have done this, are you excited about what you created for yourself? If not, consider revisiting if it’s something that pulls at you, that you are yearning for, or if it’s something that you think you “should do”.

For 2021, what are you proud of? What lessons did you learn? What are you completing and leaving behind?

For 2022, what are you yearning to do or become? What is your next adventure? What scares you in a good way?

I look forward to hearing what you are excited about (and scared in a good way about) so that I can cheer you on and support you. Please share in the comments or in the facebook group.

Cheers to new adventures in 2022, and remember, when you stumble, all there is to do is pick up the glove.

Give the gift of adventure for the holidays

A list of experience-based gift ideas for all budgets including last-minute gifts

This week I celebrated my 47th birthday, and I gave myself the gift of relaxation and of truly soaking in my special day. I took the day off work, booked a massage, and asked my family to take me out to dinner. It was a wonderful day in the midst of what is typically a hectic holiday season.

My mom was also born in December and she worked hard to give me a great birthday that didn’t feel overshadowed by Christmas. It wasn’t until I was an adult with my own family that I realized how hard it must have been for her to pull off. When I was little, the whole month of December felt sparkly and magical, but when I became a mother myself, I felt squeezed. I felt like any gift for my birthday was an extra burden that took something away from the kids’ Christmas. For many years, especially the years I was out of the workforce, I used birthday gift cards to buy presents for the kids and other family members. And I was grateful that I had those extra funds to do so.

Then I went to the reverse for a few years and spent way too much on Christmas gifts – and had to deal with the stress of overspending and credit card balances.

Learning from my mistakes of overspending on “things” and having a zero to low budget Christmas for several years taught me some positive lessons that help me to remember to feel gratitude for my loved ones at this time of year, and to do my best to pause and enjoy the experience of the holidays. Giving gifts is meant to show our love and appreciation, and the size of the gift and the size of the price tag don’t reflect how much we value someone. Some of my favorite gifts that I’ve ever given and received have been presents that gave the gift of quality time, a unique experience or an adventure, and that did not cost much at all.

That is the theme of this week’s blog post – giving the gift of adventure.

Many people are expressing their desire to have less “stuff”, to get out and do things, and to spend quality time with those they love. There are experience-based gifts at all budget ranges, and there is still time to gift adventure as many experiences can be arranged at the last minute.

In the Birth of Adventure Facebook group this week, members shared experience-based gifts they had given or received. Thank you to everyone who submitted ideas, and the list below includes great quotes and suggestions for gift ideas for individuals, families, children, clients, and are at all ranges of the budget spectrum.

The key to a great experience or adventure based gift is to match it to the person’s interests and aspirations. If your friend has absolutely no desire to get outdoors, and you’ve asked them a million times to go hiking with you and they always say no, gifting them a backpack or hike challenge will likely not be welcome, and is really more of what you want than what they want. But if they keep talking about how much they wish they could make French macarons, you can give them a gift certificate for a French baking class and see the joy light up their face!

If you use me as an example, if you’ve read my blog post: Birth of Adventure Part One: Discovering Adventure in New Zealand, you’ll know that giving me a gift certificate to go hang gliding would be a bad idea, but offering to dogsit Louie while we’re in Scotland in 2022 would be a great gift idea. (No hint intended unless you like carrying senior dogs up and down stairs and taking them outside a million times a day, in which case, you’re hired!

Louie wishing he could come with us to Scotland

Adventure/Experience Gift Ideas:

This list starts with the quotes below from Birth of Adventure Facebook group members sharing some of their favorite gifts:

From J.D.: “Last year, we moved away from gifting ‘things’ and started gifting adventure starting with our family Grand Circle Tour that finally happened in July. This year, adventure is 100% the theme of our gift-giving.”

From Q.S.L. “When I was pregnant with our first kid some good friends gave us a gift certificate for ‘canoe-trip-schlepping-with-baby’. We knew several families that stopped tripping when they had kids because they just couldn’t figure out the details of camping with a baby. Those friends came on our first canoe trip when the baby was 9mos old and helped us make that trip happen!”

From S.E.: “Our kids love homemade coupons for family game nights, movie night, night hikes, trips to the park, etc. It costs us nothing and they love it because they are in control.”

From J.O.: “I scheduled a ‘float session’ for my husband for his birthday. I secretly packed him a change of clothes and put it in the car. Then, while we were just running errands, I pulled into the spa and told him I was going to leave him there for a bit. I walked in and got him checked in, then left him in their hands. He loved it! Since then, we have done couple’s floating.”

From J.M.: “My parents gifted all of us a trip to Hawaii for Xmas.”

From L.R.: “My daughter gave me kayak rentals for her and myself for my first time kayaking. I so loved it.”

These are creative and thoughtful gifts that were clearly loved, and they range from low/no cost to high, so there are many options for many budgets.

Here is a list of some other ideas shared by Birth of Adventure group members and my own compilation. (Any links below are for your convenience – I am not an affiliate and am not gaining from sharing.)

Giving a coupon to teach a skill you have like snowshoeing, hiking or archery to someone who wants to learn
If you can’t teach a skill like the above, giving a gift certificate for and/or taking the individual to a lesson in golf, snowshoeing, hatchet throwing, archery, cross country skiing, etc.

Gift certificate for local or online classes such as music lesson or cooking class
Skill-building classes for makers, or those expressing desire to learn crafting, building, woodworking, jewelry making, etc.
Tool lending library pass for someone who wants to learn to build/woodwork but does not yet have access to tools
Coupon to babysit for parents of small children so they can get away
Coupon to dog or cat sit for person/family with pets
Transferring your airline miles to give airline gift cards to close family members
Museum, zoo, or local attraction passes – can be individual or family
Airbnb or VRBO gift card for home rental around the globe – any amount
Airbnb online experiences – ranging from $7-$50
For children/caregivers – summer camp gift certificate (including Girl Scout camp!)
Theater or concert tickets
MasterClass, or Udemy course or subscription
AAA/CAA membership – currently the $15 one-time enrollment fee is waived for gifting a membership – basic membership is $60 – with two higher level tiers – membership includes the 24 hour roadside service and other services associated with AAA/CAA and also access to travel planning, maps and discounts at many travel vendors
Travel book for destinations on person’s wishlist
Journal, headlamp, gear, etc. for person’s next trip
Scratch-off maps of continents or countries person wants to explore
Gifting marathon or race entries to runners, including Vacation Races (estimated $20-25 for community races, $100-$300 for bigger races)
And last but not least, gifting National Park, State Park and Provincial Park passes

USA National Park Service Annual Passes range from free to $80 per year depending on your age, military and veteran status, and other factors; individual national and state parks can also have passes at lower price points (can also purchase inter-agency passes that include National Forests)
Parks Canada passes range from free to $69.19 for individual adults and up to $139.40 for a group of 7, depending on age and other factors; individual parks can also have passes at lower price points
Admission to UK national parks is already free – however there is a “curated collection” of experiences that you can purchase for someone that take place at the UK national parks

If you try any of these gift ideas or if you have other ideas, please share them at the Birth of Adventure page, or in the comments below.

I wish you moments and memories this holiday season. I am challenging myself to stop each day, take a breath and experience what is happening around me. When I’m knee-deep in apple peels, baking apple crisp or running out for that last stocking stuffer, I promise to stop, look around, soak in the moment and remember that it is the experiences and people that matter the most.

Happy holidays, and happy adventuring,

Alison

When learning to say no, be open to saying yes

There is a lot of discussion right now about the importance of saying no, especially when it comes to reducing stress and burnout. Learning to prioritize yourself, setting boundaries, saying no to things that don’t fuel you or work for you is important. I agree with that wholeheartedly, and I also feel that sometimes what will fuel you, reduce your stress and give you energy is the opposite of that – it’s saying yes, to the right things.

The trick is, how do you know when it’s time to say yes or time to say no?

I’m still learning this too, and I challenged myself this year to “be open to being a yes”. After nearly two years of social distancing, I’ve gotten very comfortable with saying no. My couch and I have become glued together and we’re practically best friends, so it will take a lot for me to leave it. Especially if the opportunity will pull me out of my comfort zone and safe cocoon.

By being open to being a yes, I stay curious longer. When my instincts kick in, usually protective, and often hollering “no, stay home!”, I sit with them a minute and figure out why I want to say no.

I’m learning to say yes when there is an opportunity to bond, to learn, to grow, in short, to feel more alive, and when the reasons to say no are to keep me feeling comfortable and to avoid any uncertainty or social anxiety.

Here are some examples:

Earlier this summer, I was given an opportunity to play in a golf tournament for nonprofit staff. Two years ago, when invited to a golf tournament, I said “No”. I wanted to say no this time. But I was challenging myself to be open to being a yes so I sat with it for a minute. The longer I sat with it, the fears started spooling out:

I don’t know how to play golf.
Not only that, but I had taken a group lesson four years before and had been BAD at it.
The tournament was a networking event and everyone would see how bad I was. They might think that my bad playing was representative of women or Girl Scouts.

Once I sat with those fears, some other things bubbled up:

Being outside on a gorgeous day fuels me.
Spending time with good people, walking and talking, fuels me.
I also considered that the lesson I’d taken four years ago might not have been an empowering one, and possibly I might do better with a new teacher, and in a group of Girl Scouts?
And speaking of Girl Scouts, I was excited to walk our talk, and to be courageous and try new things, just like we encourage our girls to do.

I said “Yes” to the golf tournament. Three of us in our 4 woman team were new golfers and we took a lesson together ahead of time. We were a supportive circle, trying something new and cheering each other on. On the day of the tournament, with our one seasoned golfer, our mighty team held our own. Sure, experienced teams passed us and we didn’t finish the full course, and we had to outrun a fox that stalked us to steal our snacks (true story), but it was fun, and each of us had moments where we shone.

I tried this approach again when my husband David asked me to go sailing with him which I had never done before. It was $25 which was doable, and we’d be sailing with a seasoned sailor, and with our neighbors and fellow students from his American Sailing Association (ASA) 101 certification class. David received a gift certificate for the ASA 101 class for his birthday and he was excited to share his new hobby with me.

My instincts went into protective mode. I love the water and I love being in boats, but I could feel a big “no” brewing. My father drowned in a boating incident when I was 6 months old, and I have a deep appreciation for the dangers of boating. Being in a little boat, with amateur sailors, ropes, and possibly being asked to do something skilled and “sailory” with no idea what I was doing – none of this sounded relaxing and serene at all. It sounded stressful.

I could have said no and been content at home with my couch BFF and the remote all to myself, and it would have been valid. Because of my challenge to myself, I sat with the feeling a bit longer. Yes, there was a lot that was scary. And, there were some opportunities that might be worth it. I do really love the water. Being out in the middle of Lake Erie would likely be beautiful. I’d also been curious about sailing, and it was a new thing to try. And, it could be a bonding experience with David who really wanted me to go with him.

I said yes to sailing. And I loved it – it was one of the best nights of my summer. By saying yes I got to experience the invigorating breeze on my face, the sails flapping in the wind, the pink hue of the sunset, and the sparkling view of the city lights of Buffalo. I also got to drive the boat for a bit, and helped hoist one of the sails. I had an adventure.

These are two examples of times I’ve said yes, and I’ll balance that with a recent time that I said “no”.

I recently said no to attending a board meeting. That may sound like an easy decision but this was my final board meeting after serving for nine years. I wanted to be there. I wanted to complete my third term fully and to say goodbye and to feel the sense of completion.

I was traveling for a work conference in Arizona and although I could zoom into the meeting the thought filled me with angst.

It was already stressful traveling during the pandemic, it was a busy time at work, and after being home so much, I felt anxious leaving my family and dog.

It was my first trip to Arizona and leaving a day early gave me the time to see the desert and vistas. I was excited to reunite with my colleagues from around the country. The prospect of sitting in a hotel room for two hours on my laptop during my free evening didn’t sound good, especially as I’d be exhausted after traveling since 4:30am.

I struggled with saying no because I didn’t have what I would have considered a “valid” reason – like a family emergency or childcare issue. The reason was valid though. My reason was to prioritize my energy and my mental health. Participating in the meeting on top of everything else felt like too much. I knew I needed to rest and to have down time.

I said “no” to the board meeting. I emailed my questions and thoughts on the board packet ahead of time. I offered to join for the first 15 minutes for a vote and then I would turn off my computer, go outside and be fully present where I was. They understood and even surprised me by sharing appreciation for my service early in the meeting while I was on. It filled my cup to join them, and then filled my cup to leave and be present where I was, being with my colleagues, and resting and relaxing in the beautiful Tucson air.

So back to the question – how do you know when to say yes or to say no?

I took a class recently that said to look at your energy as deposits and withdrawals, and for anything that drains your energy, for example, a full day of zoom meetings, it’s important to then replenish your energy, like resting, hiking, talking with your friends, volunteering, whatever works for you. Looking at your energy this way can help in learning when to say yes and when to say no. You’re the best expert on what fuels you and what drains you.

I am an introvert, someone who loves alone time, to write, read and watch movies, and also a social being who loves my family and loves adventure. This can take some balance since many of the things I want to do and can be good for me, can also deplete me of energy at the same time. I feel lifted up by spending time with people, but my introverted and socially anxious side will want to start retreating at some point. Consider me someone who wants to be invited to your party, will be friendly and meet new people, and then will hightail home within one to a few hours. And if we’re being honest, even better than going to your party would have been just you and me hanging out at a coffee shop or going for a walk.

I started seeing a counselor in spring 2020 and with her, I’ve been learning how to better set boundaries. I’m learning and practicing to say no when I need a break, no to things that will drain me, no to things that I’m not interested in, no to things that aren’t a priority for me and my family. And that includes saying no at times in work and in volunteer roles, and no to people I care about too.

In learning to say no, I’m creating space and energy to be open to saying yes. Yes to what will fuel me, yes to what is aligned with my values, yes to what gives me purpose, yes to helping my friends and family, and yes to adventure.

I challenge you this week to be open to being a yes. Pay attention to times you automatically want to say no to a new opportunity or adventure. Sit with those feelings for a minute and see what opens up for you. You never know if an adventure is awaiting!